"The difficulty with this conversation is that it is very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees."
Douglas Adams
Unlike the late UK comic and writer, Douglas Adams, many of us do not spend our time speaking to trees; maybe we should, but much more likely we do not. As an alternative we spend lots of our time chatting, and having chats with people we know, or with folks we are in the midst of getting familiar with.
The people we are familiar with are conversant with our mannerisms and conversational habits. Unfortunately, the people we are just getting to grasp are not. Therefore should you be looking to create a 'first ' positive impression, here are 3 basic conversational body moves which will assist you in doing exactly that.
1. Eye Contact.
In Northern America the eyes are the most vital element in forming an impression of somebody. Thru eye contact you show your fervour and interest in wanting to meet, and speak with the other person. Tell them that you are thrilled to meet them and they are the object of your attention. Any mutual and lasting conversation begins with eye contact between you and the other person.
2. Facial Expressions.
When referring to non-verbal communication, it is our face expressions that disclose the most. In his book, How to Talk to Anyone, 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships, Leil Lowndes, in one of his chapters, tells the tale about a boss who advances her career by changing her expressions. The executive was stunned to discover how her facial expressions were being understood by others and the impact this had on collegues in her office , as well as, on her clients. Most of the time, our expressions are spontaneous: on automated pilot. What expressions do you carry on your face when having a conversation with others? Are your expressions harried and intense or relaxed and amiable?
3. Body Positioning.
In her book, The Art of Civilized Conversation Margaret Shepherd announces that we should be conscious of how we position our body and how we use space when meeting and talking with others. Our movements send signals to the other person together with give meaning to the words we use. When you lean forward, slightly, nod or tilt your head, you signal that you are interested in what the other person has to assert, as does standing and facing your conversation partner directly.
Studies have proven that each of us has their own private space, and that we feel uncomfortable when a person, especially someone we don't know or don't love, violates that space either by moving closer to us or by touching us. According to Shepherd, it is very important to be aware of cultural differences and she suggests, a good rule of thumb is to keep an arm's length of gap between yourself and the person with whom you are speaking.
These 3 basic conversational body moves are more significant than words. They convey your interest and eagerness to remain and chat with somebody, or they can shout volumes about your absence of interest and need to get away.
Douglas Adams
Unlike the late UK comic and writer, Douglas Adams, many of us do not spend our time speaking to trees; maybe we should, but much more likely we do not. As an alternative we spend lots of our time chatting, and having chats with people we know, or with folks we are in the midst of getting familiar with.
The people we are familiar with are conversant with our mannerisms and conversational habits. Unfortunately, the people we are just getting to grasp are not. Therefore should you be looking to create a 'first ' positive impression, here are 3 basic conversational body moves which will assist you in doing exactly that.
1. Eye Contact.
In Northern America the eyes are the most vital element in forming an impression of somebody. Thru eye contact you show your fervour and interest in wanting to meet, and speak with the other person. Tell them that you are thrilled to meet them and they are the object of your attention. Any mutual and lasting conversation begins with eye contact between you and the other person.
2. Facial Expressions.
When referring to non-verbal communication, it is our face expressions that disclose the most. In his book, How to Talk to Anyone, 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships, Leil Lowndes, in one of his chapters, tells the tale about a boss who advances her career by changing her expressions. The executive was stunned to discover how her facial expressions were being understood by others and the impact this had on collegues in her office , as well as, on her clients. Most of the time, our expressions are spontaneous: on automated pilot. What expressions do you carry on your face when having a conversation with others? Are your expressions harried and intense or relaxed and amiable?
3. Body Positioning.
In her book, The Art of Civilized Conversation Margaret Shepherd announces that we should be conscious of how we position our body and how we use space when meeting and talking with others. Our movements send signals to the other person together with give meaning to the words we use. When you lean forward, slightly, nod or tilt your head, you signal that you are interested in what the other person has to assert, as does standing and facing your conversation partner directly.
Studies have proven that each of us has their own private space, and that we feel uncomfortable when a person, especially someone we don't know or don't love, violates that space either by moving closer to us or by touching us. According to Shepherd, it is very important to be aware of cultural differences and she suggests, a good rule of thumb is to keep an arm's length of gap between yourself and the person with whom you are speaking.
These 3 basic conversational body moves are more significant than words. They convey your interest and eagerness to remain and chat with somebody, or they can shout volumes about your absence of interest and need to get away.
About the Author:
An excellent and prize-winning speaker, Dorothea Hendriksbrings you presentations, keynotes, training and workshops that engage, entertain and inform. Some say her passion is a tonic. Dorothea's experience is teaching people how to connect, communicate and develop working relations. Whether or not you are speaking to a massive group, or having an one-to-one conversation, her accent on the soft skills of communication, perspective, interpersonal, networking, and conversational development for positive outcomes which will build sales and promote careers. A successful entrepreneur, Dorothea focuses on helping you go beyond your personal barriers, thru public talking, show techniques, in order to successfully traverse your networking events with poise, grace and results.
No comments:
Post a Comment